Mar 31st

   10:00pm | Critters 2 (1988) | PG-13 |
It's Easter! And what better way to celebrate than with Critters 2, the one with the Critter Ball! "Maybe go to church, you heathen?" Hmmmm, noted and ignored. The Crites are back and their colorful, easter egg-looking offspring are hatching around town during the holiday hunt. Mick Garris is behind this wonderful, stupid, gross-out creature feature. Jesus would want you to see the Critter Ball, trust me.
Starring: Scott Grimes, Liane Curtis, Terrance Mann, Lin Shaye, Sam Anderson, Lindsay Parker

Mar 29th

   11:00pm | Geostorm (2017) | PG-13 |
Gerard Butler, making a solid career for himself in disaster movies. Up to Natural Disasters and including ones that happen to political buildings around the world. This is the first one (that I know of) he did about a natural disaster of a car. I mean, sheesh, the Geo Storm... what a piece of crap. Made of plastic and bubble wrap, hardly capable of more than 60mph, looks like a watered-down Saturn. Wait, what? Hang on, I'm getting a note from my producers that this movie is actually NOT about the late 90s JV-sports car the Geo Storm. It is actually the Friday Night Midnight Movie though!!
Starring: Gerard Butler, Jim Sturgess, Abbie Cornish, Alexandra Maria Lara, Daniel Wu, Ed Harris, Andy Garcia

Mar 26th

   10:00pm | Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013) | PG-13 |
If you thought The Hunger Games really tugged at your teenage angst, wait 'till you see Hunger Games 2! This is actually rated the best of the series and clocks in at an impressive 2 1/2 hours that don't really feel that long at all. There's Arrow Hero, and Partner Peter, and Hot Side Piece, and the Admin Panel.... And they all have significantly stupider names than I just gave them. But it's actually a pretty great movie!
Starring: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Philip Seymour Hoffman, Jack Quaid, Taylor St. Clair, Woody Harrelson, Stanley Tucci

Mar 25th

   11:00pm | The Creator (2023) | PG-13 |
Martian Arts Monday? I'm not sure, but it doesn't look like Earth on the box art. It does mention fairly prominently 'From the Director of Rogue One'. Is that a good thing? Was that one people liked? I dunno, I haven't watched a Star War since Insidous Devil and the Double Saber. This could be one for all I know! But it's about stopping a killer AI that's tryna wipe out all humanity. So now that Skynet is online, and chatGPT is doing everybody's homework, this is a dystopian future movie taking place in like, 5 years?
Starring: John David Washington, Madeleine Yuna Voyles, Gemma Chan, Allison Janney, Ken Watanabe

Mar 24th

   11:00pm | Confessions of a Dangerous Mind (2002) | R |
The Cloondog's directorial debut is a solid flick, if sorta underground and under-appreciated. This is a story about game show host Chuck Barris, who was a bit of a liar in his spare time. Also, this is written by Charlie Kaufman, so timelines and wtf-ery play in as well. It's a strange film about a strange man, but somehow Cloontown pulls it all together really nicely, and Rockwell is at his best in the lead!
Starring: Sam Rockwell, Drew Barrymore, George Clooney, Julia Roberts

Mar 22nd

   11:00pm | Basket Case (1982) | NR |
Ohhh Frank Henenlotter, you wonderful, disgusting man. How I do love your films. This is where he got his start, working with early Troma Studios. It's about a guy carrying around his formerly conjoined twin who wants revenge on the doctors that separated them and also anybody else within convenient basket-grabbing range. This movie's gross and stupid... you definitely shouldn't watch it (nodding and smiling). It's the Friday Night Midnight Movie!!!
Starring: Kevin VanHentenryck, Terri Susan Smith, Beverly Bonner, Lloyd Pace

Mar 18th

   11:00pm | Bad Boys for Life (2020) | R |
It's Marshal Arts Monday! The Bad Boys are back! And they're here for life, except not at the Oscars, one Bad Boy has to wait another 8 years for that. Witty dialog, car chases, Miami sunshine, gun fights, and explosions are sure to abound. And I'm gonna bet one or more Bad Boys is gettin' too old for this shit. Man, they squeezed this one in right before covid and George Floyd huh? Oh there's another one coming out this year? Well, you know the saying, AHCAH: All Hollywood Cops Are Heroes!
Starring: Will Smith, Marin Lawrence, Vanessa Hudgens, Joey Pants, DJ Khaled, Happy Anderson, Michael Bay

Mar 17th

   11:00pm | Leprechaun in the Hood (2000) | R |
I don't have too much to say, it's pretty much all right there in the title. There's rappers, and pimps, and guns, and all manner of likely problematic stereotypes. But there's also our murderous, little friend with his witty one-liners and limericks. It's actually a surprsingly fun time, so long as you don't take it too seriously!
Starring: Warwick Davis, Ice-T, Anthony Montgomery, Rashaan Nall, Red Grant, Dan Martin

Mar 15th

   11:00pm | Godzilla Minus One (2023) | PG-13 |
Godzilla. Sure, the allegory isn't exactly subtle, but he's probably still one of the most prolific cinematic monsters of all time. I hear this latest version is just absolutely awesome, and I actually don't even need to be convinced to watch a Godzilla movie. Hell, I'll watch 1998 Godzilla and you're not gonna find me havin' a bad time. Dat bitch straight up laid godzilla eggs in Madison Square Garden, bro! But we're in for a helluva good time and good movie with this doozy! It's the Friday Night Midnight Movieeeeee!!
Starring: Sakura Ando, Minami Hamabe, Ryunosuke Kamiki, Munetaka Aoki

Mar 12th

   10:00pm | Risky Business (1983) | R |
Most teens are gonna get into a bit of trouble when their parents go away for the weekend. Starting your own harem goes a little further than most teens. But here we are, TC dances around in his underwear in a cinema classic scene, Rebecca De Mornay prances around in hers, and also Cousin Balki is there! Get out your Ray Bans and just take those old records off the shelf, we're headed to 1983!
Starring: Tom Cruise, Rebecca De Mornay, Joey Pants, Richard Masur, Bronson Pinchot

Mar 11th

   10:00pm | The Menu (2022) | R |
We watched this last year, but I gotta see it again. It's just so rich and dense with flavorful story, like a Belgian chocolate tart topped with cheesecake blossom strawberries. Or something... I dunno. I should probably let the film do the fancy talking, cuz I'll be eating a frozen pizza during it.
Starring: Ralph Fiennes, Anya Taylor-Joy, Nicholas Hoult, Hong Chau, Janet McTeer, John Leguizamo

Mar 10th

   11:00pm | Anna (2019) | R |
How did I miss this one during the one-named-woman-movie series last month? How did I miss this one all together? I'll tell you how, Luc Besson just churns out movies like it's his job (it is) and continues to not tell anyone (that's me)! Every time I turn around there's another Luc Besson movie about a woman kickass-ing and assassinat-ing here, there, and everywhere around the world. Well, that's fine by me I guess, I just wish he'd finally start responding to my text messages.
Luc, u up? where u at? new movie when?
Starring: Sasha Luss, Helen Mirren, Luke Evans, Cillian Murphy

Mar 8th

 

   11:00pm | Street Trash (1987) | NR |
Here's another awesome cult classic from 1987. Goddamn they were onto somethin' that year. Must have been something in the water. Well, in this case, it's something in the booze. A liquor store owner finds a bunch of unknown "Tenafly Viper" bottles in his basement and decides to sell them to the local hobos for a buck each. That's just good business! At least until all the body melting and goopy, gory exploding starts. It's a pretty gross one! It's the Friday Night Midnight Movie!!
Starring: Mike Lackey, Mark Sferrazza, Bill Chepil, Vic Noto, Jane Arakawa

Mar 5th

   10:00pm | Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023) | PG-13 |
Indiana Jones 5: How many more of these can Harrison Ford squeeze out? I haven't seen this yet, but I'm kind of excited. I mean, it CAN'T be worse than KotCS. Although I'll admit that one has soured me more than a little on the idea of keeping this series going at all. Is Ford a hologram in this? Karen Allen returns, and Phoebo Wall-Bridge is a welcome addition, looking like a young Marion, possibly her daughter? Maybe a little Indy-baby? Just don't call her junior... or admit any responsibility 'till after she's 18. Archaeologist salary ain't what it used to be.
Starring: Harrison Ford, Phoebe Waller-Bridge, Antonio Banderas, Karen Allen, John Rhys-Davies, Toby Jones

Mar 4th

   10:00pm | Ghosts of Mars (2001) | R |
It's Martian Arts Monday again! We're big John Carpenter fans here, so I may be biased or maybe I just understand his work better than critics. He is perfectly capable of making truly terrifying horror (The Thing, Halloween), but he's also never taken himself or the genre so seriously that he can't make fun popcorn movies (They Live, BTiLC). This was never supposed to be a serious movie, and everyone should be ashamed that gave it bad reviews based on that misunderstanding. From the mouth of the man himself, "it's called 'Ghosts of Mars', for christ's sake!" Anyway, it's the future, ship crew gets attacked by Mars colonizers possessed by ghosts.
Starring: Ice Cube, Natasha Henstridge, Pam Grier, Jason Statham, Clea DuVall

Mar 3rd

   10:00pm | Heat (1995) | R |
Apparently the vast (like almost all) bank robberies are super duper boring, and usually done with a hand-written note. If the perp can make it out of the parking lot they can get away with it. All those cameras and security features are actually just there to ease the minds of the NON-robbing patrons. Well, screw that! We're going back to a time when heisting was full-on hollywood action shootouts, car chases, hostage negotiating fuck fests! 1995 to be exact. And who better than Michael Mann to put together an all-star cast in an extremely tight thriller and quite possibly the greatest heisting movie ever. Get ready for a banger!
Starring: Al Pacino, Robert De Niro, Val Kilmer, Jon Voight, Tom Sizemore, Ashley Judd, Diane Venora, William Fichtner, Natalie Portman, Hank Azaria

Mar 1st

 

   10:00pm | The Nun (2018), The Nun 2 (2023) | R |
We're jumping back into the Conjuring-verse! Where known fraudsters Ed and Lorraine Warren are given the hollywood glow-up and pretty people to play them treatment. Only this time there's no scary Annabelle doll and we're in the 50s and Romania and/or France. Wait, how does this timeline work? And Taissa Farmiga is here doing nun-stuff, but not The Nun stuff. Did you know she's actually Vera's sister, not daughter? Crazy! But not as crazy as it's about to get on a Friday Night Double Creature Feature!!
Starring: Taissa Farmiga, Demian Bichir, Bonnie Aarons, Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Anna Popplewell, Jonas Bloquet, Storm Reid