Apr 30th

   9:00pm | The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005) Andy is a virgin. A 40 year old virgin. His friends/co-workers are incensed by this. They try to get him laid. That's pretty much the jist of it! This is the unrated version, so that means we get extended hilarious improv scenes from Rudd and Rogen riffing off each other, and a few extra BOOBA, so look with respect you degens. Also RIP Circuit City, do you think we could still find one of those buildings and rent it out for like a rollerskating party or something? I mean, how much could it be, it's a Circuit City, like $10?
Starring: Steve Carell, Catherine Keener, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen, Romany Malco, Elizabeth Banks, Kat Dennings, Jonah Hill

Apr 29th  

   9:00pm | A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) Ohhh boy, I'm excited for this one! Of all the classic slasher monsters the 70s and 80s gave us, Freddy is by far the best. Jason and Mikey are fine, I'll fuck with them for some creative kills and slow-but-steady dread. But Nightmare is the truly terrifying masterpiece of 80s horror. You can follow all the rules in the horror movie survival guide you want, but everybody has to sleep eventually, and that's what makes Freddy the scariest, not just his appearance or his knife glove or his supernatural survivability. Load up your Chevy with a double date and cruise on down to the drive-in for this classic on the Friday Night Midnight Movie!
Starring: Robert Englund, Heather Langenkamp, Johnny Depp

Apr 28th

   9:00pm | Being John Malkovich (1999) Malkovich malkovich of the malkovich malkoviches malkovich! Malkovich malkovich malkovich at malkovich. Spike Malkovich and Charlie Malkovich malkoviched malkovich so malkovich, John Malkovich could malkovichly malkovich. If malkovich haven't malkoviched Being John Malkovich, malkovich malkovich right malkovich malkovich! Join for Malkovich!
Starring: John Malkovich, Catherine Malkovich, John Malkovich, Cameron Malkovich, Charlie Malkovich

Apr 27th

   9:30pm | Good Omens s1e3 (2019) Midweek Movie Break! Did we watch the first two or three last time? I guess since I can't remember we'll do three tonight, maybe the fourth. They're hour long so it's fine. Ummmm, so there's Crowley and Aziraphale doing bumbling angel work to find Antichrist Adam to either bring about or stop the end of the world. And now Agnes's descendant Anathema comes in with the witch side of things. And Jon Hamm is Gabriel, doing stuff as well. Man I really have a bad memory of this series..
Starring: David Tennant, Michael Sheen, Frances McDormand, Jon Hamm

Apr 26th  

   9:00pm | Spider-Man 2 (2004) I think we all saw this coming tonight. This one is arguably the best of all the spoodermans, so feel free to debate that in chat. I think it does a pretty great job of incorporating more than one villain to satisfy the blockbustery nature, but doesn't go overboard and lose sense of the movie doing so (cough cough too often DC). Juuuust the right amount of spidey slingin', Franco frownin', and Molina tentacle wigglin' to go around. But will there be awkward funeral sexual tension?? Let's gooo!
Starring: Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, Alfred Molina, James Franco, JKS, Willem Dafoe, Rosemary Harris

Apr 25th

   9:30pm | Legally Blonde (2001) My God, the scuff was strong tonight. I've never seen such garbage internet speed for that prolonged period and along with Amazon just refusing to show any movies. Well, we managed to get through the first movie I saw, which despite trying outright to be an empowerment movie for women, I just don't know about that... It's pretty funny, but I'm not sure it deserves any Nobel prizes for its portrayal of women. Who knows! It's certainly not for me say! Funny pink movie with questionable legalese did fine in place of scuff!
Starring: Reese Witherspoon, Luke Wilson

Apr 24th

   9:00pm | Old (2021) Shyamalan's latest about a relaxing day at the beach with absolutely no twist. People say they hate the beach cuz of the sand. I like sand a lot if it's good sand. But bad sand is really bad. You know, junk sand with rocks and sticks and shit. Fuck that. I came out early at sunrise once in Cancun and they were actually combing the sand, like a giant Japanese zen garden. Now that's some quality sand. Anyway, this movie... do you think Shymalan is losing his touch when he literally names the movie the twist?
Starring: Gael Garcia Bernal, Vicky Krieps, Rufus Sewell

Apr 23rd

   9:00pm | Spider-Man (2002) When this came out, I believe it was the highest grossing debut weekend of all time (of course only knocked off later by Vinny Chase and Aquaman). It's Sam Raimi's first giant blockbuster and still kinda weird to me they chose him. Not that he can do any wrong, he was just pretty well-established as a budget filmmaker. Anyway, this has all your favorites: Tobey's Surprised Pikachu Face as Spooderman, radioactive arachnia, upside-down rain kissing, J.K. Simmons, and probably like Creed song or something for the end credits. Finally I can start playing these movies on Tuesdays now!
Starring: Tobey Maguire, Kirsten Dunst, Willem Dafoe, James Franco, JKS

Apr 22nd  

   11:00pm | From Dusk Till Dawn (1995) Probably one of my favorite movies of all time! This one absolutely has it all. A heist crime drama with plenty of perfectly played comedic bits showcasing what both director Rodriguez and new star Clooney would become... very rapidly (and by that I mean suddenly) takes a turn into horror and then does THAT perfectly too! It's an absolute powerhouse of neo Grindhouse cinema. And it's perfect for the Friday Night Midnight Movie!!
Starring: George Clooney, Quentin Tarantino, Harvey Keitel, Juliette Lewis, Salma Hayek, Tom Savini, Danny Trejo, Fred Williamson

Apr 21st

   9:00pm | Se7en (1995) It's my Twitch-aversary! Thanks to everyone who's hung out and enjoyed some great movies and scuffed streams along the way! Here's one of the greatest movies ever made, coming in hot at #19 on IMDB all time. This is a seriously dark, gritty crime story about a serial killer who finds his victims and bases their murders on the seven deadly sins. This is David Fincher's true breakout film along with a beautiful Andrew Kevin Walker script. It's a truly stunning movie all the way through. All your True Detective's and modern crime thrillers pull from this shocking and appalling masterpiece. Join for.. fun?
Starring: Brad Pitt, Morgan Freeman

Apr 20th  

   10:00pm | Waiting... (2005) Happy 4-20! This is a foul movie about working in a restaurant. It's as much a lewd teen sex comedy as it is an indictment of the conditions of working in the service industry in America. It's the best of its kind too! If not ENTIRELY accurate down to the "special plating" for certain customers, it at least paints a pretty picture for anybody who hasn't worked in a restaurant before, and is one of the most original comedies of the 2000s. Raunchy, hilarious, thanks to Tabba and Grifter for pooling their tips.
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Anna Faris, John Francis Daley, Justin Long, David Koechner, Luis Guzman, Chi McBride

Apr 19th  

   9:00pm | Be Cool (2005) Am I out of Vince Vaughn movies? Pffffft! Not even close! This sequel to the superior 1995 Get Shorty is still a lot of fun and silly nonsense, even if it doesn't quite live up to original's witty charm. It's absolutely jam-packed full of celebs from music and movies, as Chili Palmer tries his hand in the ever-so-much-easier Music industry.
Starring: Johntra, Uma, The Rock, VV, Cedric the Entertainer, Andre 3000, Danny DeVito, pretty much everybody in or around Hollywood in the 2000s

Apr 18th

   9:00pm | The Amityville Horror (2005) Marital Arts Monday! There's trouble in paradise as a recently hitched couple settle in to their new, haunted home! I love this movie for so many reasons: it's the best of that era's rash of remakes of classic horrors, Melissa George is hot, but lookout for RR's ridiculously ripped shirtless shots, future star Chloe's debut and rare actually good child acting, the fact that it's seriously disturbing in the pyschological "Shining Dad's Gone Crazy" way as well as the unsettling, subtle use of FX to create gross and convincing scares. Did I mention RR's abs? This is just a stellar horror movie start to finish, props all around. And stay out of the basement...
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, CGM, PBH

Apr 17th

   9:00pm | Saved! (2004) Happy Easter! A normal girl at Christian high school gets knocked up by her gay boyfriend, and all the uptight super-christians otracize her. It's not exactly a satire I guess, but it's just a really funny look into the awful world of religious teen nuttery, as if the world of regular teens isn't bad enough. Those of us who attended a religious school (or the fateful Bible Camp) will especially identify, but it's good wholesome fun for all! Hope everyone found all thier eggs, those will start to smell after a few days, unlike our boy Jesus!
Starring: Jena Malone, Mandy Moore, Macaulay Culkin, Patrick Fugit

Apr 16th

   9:00pm | District 9 (2009) An amazingly original sci-fi film and modern masterpiece of the genre. It's no surprise Peter Jackson was the man to pluck first-time director Neil Blomkamp out of obscurity to make this gritty, relatively low budget alien movie that somehow manages to have all the elements of a blockbuster. It's also full of important subtle commentary on how our relationship to modern media/propaganda is doing as much to encourage tribalism as it is capable of bringing us together. But you don't have to worry about that, guns go boom, aliens go splat. Now get off my lawn ya filthy prawn!
Starring: Sharlto Copley, David James, Jason Cope, Nathalie Boltt, Sylvaine Strike

Apr 15th  

   11:00pm | Rollerball (2002) It's the Friday Night Midnight Movie!! You could cite any number of legitimate grievances with this piece of garbage, from Chris Klein's aggressively uninteresting face to the sheer WTF-ery of how the director of Die Hard could shit out such a bad movie. Just read the reviews, they are seriously golden...
Starring: Chris Klein, Jean Reno, LL Cool J, Rebecca Romijn, Naveen Andrews

Apr 14th

   9:00pm | Arkansas (2020) Vince Vaughn Week continues!! This is a rural, neo-noir drug deal gone wrong film and familiar face Clark Duke's writer/director debut. I'm not sure exactly what'll happen, but I can guess there'll be bodies to be buried and plot twists to be confused about!
Starring: Liam Hemsworth, Jacob Zachar, Vince Vaughn, John Malkovich, Eden Brolin, Clark Duke, Patrick Muldoon

Apr 13th

   10:00pm | Good Omens s1e1-2 (2019) I've read this book a couple times, it's definitely a favorite. And I watched at least a couple eps when this came out, but I never got around to finishing it. And from what it looks like, we should be getting a second season sometime this year. So we take Wednesday Night TV from future technology to ancient theology! Let's see what these cheeky buggers can do to bring about and/or mismanage biblical Armageddon!
Starring: David Tennant, Michael Sheen, Frances McDormand, Jon Hamm

Apr 12th  

   9:00pm | Starsky & Hutch (2004) This remake of the 70s buddy cop action show is about as fun and cheeky as they come. Stiller plays the straight man offset by his happy-go-lucky partner (10.5" shoe-wearing, brother of Luke) Owen "Weooohhhh" Wilson. And they just generally yuck it up on the streets of "Bay City" while getting in ridiculous car chases and arresting criminals with the help of their CI Snoop Dogg. And if I'm making references you don't understand, I apologize, chat must be creeping into my brain offstream. Turn on, tune in, drop out!
Starring: Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Snoop Dogg, Jason Batemen, Juliette Lewis, Carmen Electra

Apr 11th

   9:00pm | Old School (2003) This is one of my favorites. The bromance chemistry between Vaughn and Wilson is unmatched. The whole Cleary family is hilariously dysfunctional. Isla Fisher! in her breakout role is absolutely terrifying. There's so much great comedy in this, we gotta start it a bit early, cuz I know some of you lot have real jobs to get to at reasonable times!
Starring: Owen Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Rachel McAdams, Isla Fisher, Christopher Walken, Jane Seymour, BC!

Apr 10th

   9:00pm | Old School (2003) Personal note: I'm what they refer to as an "Adult Student", meaning I'm not really a junior or senior in college like the kids think of. It's more like I will possibly finish my college degree someday, but it's really nobody's concern as long I keep taking classes and spending money I definitely don't have. Will I still use my uni ID to get a $2 discount at the movie theatre? Jesus, do you guys even know me at all? Of course I will! And do they accept food stamps for popcorn?
Starring: Will Ferrell, Luke Wilson, Vince Vaughn, Jeremy Piven, Ellen Pompeo, Juliette Lewis, Leah Remini, Elisha Cuthbert, Matt Walsh, just so many

Apr 9th

   11:00pm | Mr. & Mrs. Smith (2005) This is one of the best romcomaction movies ever! What do you call that? Romactedy? Actcomance? I dunno, but you can't get better than Brad and Angelina both skulking about all sexy and threatening for the length of this thriller! And if you're more into the Page 6 side of things, I'm pretty sure this is where the two met and started the off-screen affair that would break up Brennifer and lead to the whole football team of Pitt-Jolie adopt-o-brood.
Starring: Brangelina, Adam Brody, Vince Vaughn, Michelle Monaghan, Keith David, Chris Weitz

Apr 8th  

   11:00pm | Solarbabies (1986) This is an awful mess of apocalyptic sci-fi cliches and cringey teen angst all crammed into a sweaty little ball of complete nonsense. It's like Hunger Games meets Mad Max, where a group of future desert orphans find a glowing alien orb that's supposed to bring rain back to Earth, so they have to fight the military for some reason... all while ON ROLLERSKATES. Yeah. ....it's the Friday Night Midnight Movie!!
Starring: Richard Jordan, Jami Gertz, Jason Patric, Lukas Haas

Apr 7th  

   9:00pm | BigBug (2022) I do not know this movie. What I do know is Jean-Pierre Jeunet, so I can assure you that this French film is about a group of eccentrics in a dystopian society living their lives despite themselves and those around them. There will most likely be a lovely score and a weird instrumental scene, an odd but endearing romance/love triangle, and a very real possibility of Troglodytes in the walls. It's Grifter's redeem, lesssgoooooo!
Starring: Isabelle Nanty, Elsa Zylberstein, Claude Perron, Stéphane De Groodt, Youssef Hajdi

Apr 6th

   10:00pm | Upload s2e4-7 (2022) Midweek Movie Break! Get out your bank cards and toss 'em into the cloud, cuz we're livin' it up in Shady Acres Retirement Community for the perpetually dead! Will they or won't they?? And of course I mean, will the maid get it on with our guy while wearing the full mo-cap VRupload body suit again. Again?
Starring: Murdered Hunk, Nora the Explorer, Scuba Suit Fiancee, Hippie Dippie Commune Nerd, Fun Dead Friend

Apr 5th  

   10:00pm | Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard (2021) Patrick Hughes' Ryan Reynolds' Samuel L. Jackson's hitman's bodyguard's wife's movie about Antonio Banderas' Salma Hayek's protective needs and/or services. I dunno. I don't really remember what the first one was about, I just know I liked it a lot! I'm sure there will be guns and twists and whatnot!
Starring: Ryan Reynolds, Sam Jackson, Salma Hayek, Antonio Baderas

Apr 4th

   9:00pm | Fearless (2006) Jet Li's epic true story of Kung Fu master Huo Yuanjia. It's got beautiful imagery, awesome fight choreography, and a nice tight story arc for the hero. I don't really have any jokes, it's just a great movie! It's Martial Arts Monday!
Starring: Jet Li, Li Sun

Apr 3rd

   9:00pm | The Watch (2012) I haven't seen this one! It's surprising the middling reviews it gets with all the talent involved, inlcuding director Akiva Schaffer and writers Rogen and Goldberg. Who knows, maybe it got chopped up by the studio or something. So some neighborhood watch fellas come across an alien invasion plot and have to save the neighborhood AND the world! Another night in Ohio, right?
Starring: Ben Stiller, Vince Vaughn, Jonah Hill, Richard Ayoade, Billy Crudup, Will Forte

Apr 2nd

   9:00pm | Pirates of the [REDACTED]: The Curse of the [REDACTED] (2003) You know what I always say about Blockbuster Saturday, "Go Big or Go Home!" I don't know if I've ever said that, but it definitely applies to tonight. I actually don't think you can get any bigger than this Hollywood Mega-Movie. It's the definition of blockbuster. And no, I'm absolutely NOT fucking terrified the Mou$e will come after me for this. (If anybody asks, we're all in my place watching this together on the DVD I own, and just use our devices to chat cuz we're degens.)
Starring: John Depp, Kira Nightley, Lando Bloomer, Jeff Rush, Zoey Saltana

Apr 1st  

   11:00pm | Drag Me to Hell (2009) Sam Raimi's triumphant return to horror is a total modern cult classic. This is a creepy, stylistic take on the classic curse tale, with a bit of a twist I guess. Let's just say the heroes and villains aren't treated with the same hollywood spackle as something like... Spiderman. It's the Friday Night Midnight Movie, bby! Strap in!!
Starring: Alison Lohman, Justin Long